• Damsel In Dating Distress


One of my biggest pet peeves is people that give off negative energy. 🤮 I've dated, been friends with, and even have family members with this unfortunate mindset... and boy do they suck the f*cking life out of you. Scientific research says that negativity is incredibly harmful and contagious, it's proven that even a small dose of negative brain activity can lead to a weak immune system, impact your intelligence and ability to think. Happiness is something we should all strive for, and while it's nearly impossible to completely get rid of negative thoughts, people and situations (everyone has their good and bad days), we can choose to strip out parts of our life that bring us down and instead refocus that energy towards being the best versions of ourselves.

The biggest detriments to success we encounter come from toxic people, Lord knows knows these damn people are no fun to be around whatsoever! And where our romantic lives are concerned, not all relationships are going to be perfect, but if you find yourself continuously questioning whether your relationship is good for you or not, then there's a high chance that you're in a negative one. Many people wind up in unhealthy relationships and are blinded to what's actually happening; you might have started dating someone who seemed sweet and charming at first... to later found out their true colours as time went on. Whatever the case may be, it's important to look out for yourself to prevent discomfort and disturbance of your mind, spirit, emotion, and body. I don't know about you but I've dated a lot of red flags in the past! It wasn't great at the time but without going through the bullshit I certainly wouldn't be where I am today. Overall I'm an optimist, I see the good in people, I believe in people the same way I do in myself, I give people the benefit of the doubt, and often times my kindness has been taken for a weakness. Thankfully the logical side of my brain has stepped up in recent years so I'm able to spot bad behaviour early on, throw on my lifebuoy ring, and save myself! With that said, here are five types of negative people I've dated and would advise to avoid at all costs... THE VICTIM "Woe is me" 🙄 three words: chaotic, annoying and needy. People with a victim mentality usually refuse to take responsibility for the problems that happen in their lives and expect their loved ones to give a helping hand every time something goes wrong. They normally blame others for their problems, deny responsibility for their emotional state, and conjure up tales of how everyone has done them wrong. Ugh... next! THE TEMPERAMENTAL Now this person will have more mood swings than a female on her period. You can expect sudden changes at any particular time with or without notice or warning signs. Sadly the person I dated at the time had an issue with substance abuse which triggered a lot of his wild outbursts. I'm not gonna lie, temperamental people are often good people who are loving and caring partners to be with but they get pissed off easily with words or actions, they can't seem to gain control of their emotions, reactions and actions, therefore act based on instinct without considering the damage they could cause. In my opinion, temperamental types are weak minded people, always allowing their emotions to get the better of them. THE JUDGMENTAL Firstly, dump them immediately. Secondly, it's not you, it's definitely them! Being judgemental can be one of the most damaging things in a relationship because essentially what this person is saying is that it's not okay to be you... and that'll only end up in resentment. Don't get me wrong, being opinionated is one thing but passing judgement is simply when someone can't accept the words or behaviour of another person so they impose their standards upon them. Do yourself a favour and get rid of this fool asap because they're not only looking down at you, they also consider you not good enough for them! 🖕🏼 THE DRAMA MAGNETS Like drug addicts and alcoholics, this person is hooked on the rush of relationships and people that appear wildly exciting. And by "exciting", I don't mean it in a good way... I'm talking conflict, throwing things, yelling, verbal and physical abuse, frequent breakups and makeups, mind games, poor or non-existent boundaries, basically a nightmare of a roller coaster. I know because I used to be this person in my early teens, I also had a "bad boy" phase so I've experienced both sides of the fence. All I can say is that this type of person will not give you the relationship you truly want and deserve; if you're after a healthy and supportive, long-term romantic partnership, this ain't it! 👎🏼 THE SELF-ABSORBED Imagine being with someone who's caring, giving, and willing to compromise... well, you're not gonna find it here I'm afraid. This person's priority is "me, me, me" and will show very little interest (if any) or care for others. The problem with these types is that they haven't quite mastered their emotional intelligence, that is, they need to work on having acceptance, compassion and appreciation for others. Without these qualities, the relationship dynamic will always be one-sided and eventually turn sour.

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